Dallas Diaries: Post 2

Looking back on my trip, it proved to be far less interesting than I had guessed. Sorry, Texas, but you were only "kinda" interesting to me. Yeah, we can blame it on my business trip and how that daunted my attitude towards venturing out and "giving Texas a chance," but I will stick with my original judgments. With that said, I will try to hurry up the story where need be and just hit the good points:

Picking up from the check-in counter, I realized that my flight was delayed for 40 minutes. Obviously, I went to the bar close to my terminal and began drinking instantly. 

Here is a picture of my gate:

Notice the creepy carpet and the "slide." It looks more like a horizontal, plastic walkway more than a slide. I only felt like a creep when I noticed people notice me taking multiple pictures. No children were present. I do not know if my presence had anything to do with it.

Proof that I had alcohol during the Waste Management Phoenix Open (or whatever dumb name it has now). After Phil Mickelson sank his last putt, I, like the rest of the patrons of the bar, picked up my things and sat next to my gate. My flight was pretty full. As the Super Bowl warm ups began, I noticed how many people were traveling to Dallas and only thought: These people are probably being forced to go to Dallas as well. No one wants to go to Texas.

As I took my seat, I was placed near a man 80 years old named Roy. Roy was a very outgoing gentleman and struck conversation with me. I learned that he was had drove to Tucson from Michigan in a Ford Mustang convertible (only because the Mustang could fit his golf clubs in the trunk), who was flying back to Flynt to be with his wife. Apparently, he was cutting his vacation short because his wife suffers from Alzheimer's and wasn't doing too well. Initially, this broke my heart and he had my full attention. I felt terrible if I were to turn my head for just a second, until I realized that he was going to talk to me the entire trip, regardless of whether or not whatever he was saying was relevant or not. Not exaggerating, he would only stop talking to take a breath. Granted, I felt that this guy just wanted someone to talk to, which I lent him my shoulder to spill his heart upon, but once he began saying things like "You know what? (Pointing at lights at ground level) I wonder what that would look like if Thomas Edison never existed." There was even a point in time where I pretended to be asleep, thinking that it would get me out of any sort of awkward conversation. It didn't. He continued to nudge me to tell me some crazy thought that just entered his mind. The flight lasted two hours, and once it was done, I turned to Roy and said, "Make it home safely, sir, and never let go of your wife. You're a good man, Roy." I then proceeded to walk the fastest I have ever walked. Ever.

Once at the baggage claim, I located the driver assigned to pick me up (which felt baller as fuck). He had my name on an Ipad. For some reason, the fact that his job was to transfer me to my hotel gave me inspiration to creep him the fuck out. I kept asking him questions trying to discover the boundaries of comfort. While we were waiting for the conveyor belt to shit out my luggage, I kept trying to get a feel for the area and the laws that regulated the land. I have been to Burbank, California, which does not permit smoking ANYWHERE in the city. As a baller on a budget, I cannot afford any unnecessary tickets. Questions I asked him:

- "How much beer do you think I can intake before it is considered "illegal"?

- "Where can a guy get the 'good stuff'?"

- "In your opinion, where should I stay away from? I'm kind of a noticeable person."

- "Is it safe here?"

- "I can trust you, right?"

I waited until we got into the car to ask him this:

"You're not going to kill me, are you?"

The rest of the car ride was silent, beside my random observations. I am pretty sure it is safe to say I either bugged the shit out of him or legitimately creeped him out.

More to come later. Bed time.

Dallas Diaries: Entry One

As I sit in my hotel room in Dallas, Texas, on the first night of my 12 night business trip, it is hard to wrap my around what is going on. Being this is my first business-related trip, I must admit that this is completely out of my comfort zone. To most people, this may seem exciting and come off as an opportunity for a new adventure, but I am still in limbo to how I feel about it. I guess that I will have a more accurate depiction of it when it is all said and done, but right now, I feel like I am in midst of a giant car crash, slowly living out the flipping of a car, buckled in only to observe every excruciating detail as they come along praying for it to hastily pass by. I am trapped in a single moment. The most frustrating thing about it is that I don't know how to make it happen faster.

Some would take advantage of said opportunity to explore a city they have never been in before, but the only thing that interests me is going home. Several of my coworkers have, by day two, gone out and supported another coworker as he performed jazz at a low-key club. Instead, I stayed inside of my hotel room studying. I came here for a reason: to take this training course and pass the test that proceeded it. This trip is about one thing for me: Dollar, dollar bills, y'all. (Dear god, I feel that Texas has begun rubbing off on me!) I am not here to make friends, nor am I here to live out some wild fantasy. I am here on account of my company, which I pledged to represent in the utmost honor. I am here for the bigger picture and the dream of getting where I want to be. I am not the 21 year former version of myself anymore; I take pride in bettering myself and supporting the livelihood of myself and my girlfriend and eventually making our dreams come true. At the end of the day, that is what is most important to me. I want to do comedy, and although these experiences fuel the writing machine, they are minor steps for me to get where I want to be: Los Angeles, California.

Hours prior to my departure, I spent the morning with Audrey and decided not to smoke. I felt proud. I felt mature. As we were enjoying each other's company, we were delaying the inevitable. I was going to leave for 12 days (this is the longest [by far] that I have spent away from her in our 3 years together). We watched several episodes of "The New Normal" on Hulu Plus and laughed our hollow laughter, as we both could tell that we were dreading what was to come. Ironically, I felt (at the time) that the hardest thing was to be the stick in mud who had to ruin the party to say, "Well, I think we should get going." After a silent car ride, we came to a stop at the departure curb at Sky Harbor International Airport, Terminal 3. That, I was to find, was the most difficult part of this entire experience. We both sat facing forward, fighting the reality of the situation, hoping that if no one said anything it didn't have to happen. Being the asshole who got us in this situation, I fought the tears and could only force out a single word before tearing up.

As we said our resilient goodbyes, I turned towards the check-in counter a mess. Fortunately for me, a wonderful representative from American Airlines guided me towards an automatic teller. With my mind still a whirlwind, she was able to look past my reddened eyes and help me towards my ultimate destination. My words, uncomprehending, but that was no challenge for this war-hardened employee who may have thought I was just a little bitch (pronounced: Little Beeeeeyitch). I think our conversation went as so:

Her: "Hello, sir! How may I help you today?"
Me: "I, uhh, have a business thing, that I... uhh, (my company name), I have to go to Dallas for this thing."
Her: "Okay, not a problem, sir. Do you have a credit or debit card with your name on it?"
Me: "25 years old."
Her: (staring at me, understandably bewildered) "I didn't ask you how old you were."
Me: "Oh! What?! I thought you asked me how old I was./Haha!"
Her: "No, sir. I did not. Now, do you have a credit/debit card that I can find your ticket with?"

As I handed her my card, she took care of the rest, including my bag that I needed to have checked in. I proceeded towards my gate after that, but the following details are for another post. I need to sleep so that I can make my training class tomorrow.

Until then...